the parallel blog
Colin, your blogs are way too thoughtful for me. Tell me something...when you figure out all that shit about pricking yourself and picking up the pieces and then blog it, is it just theory or is it really already in practice?
Life does not get all figured out like at the end of "House."
Here I am all stressed out about school and clinical hours, and yesterday I heard that in the honors class they all sit around and compare their GPAs. But how does one celebrate their 4+ GPA if they've cheated their way through school, not earned it?
In the last few days I've been accused of all kinds of crap, including some stuff by the aforementioned GPA stealer. Thank god I have this cold and therefore an excuse to slip away under the sheets with Prince NyQuil, or I'd have been sleepless in the Northeast Heights.
You should move to Connecticut if you love cold weather and LL Bean catalogs. You could go skiing in Vermont and then go hang in NYC and see Broadway shows. You can be a nurse anywhere. And sometimes moving across the country and leaving life and love behind is cleansing and worthwhile.
But remember...wherever you go, there you are.
Life does not get all figured out like at the end of "House."
Here I am all stressed out about school and clinical hours, and yesterday I heard that in the honors class they all sit around and compare their GPAs. But how does one celebrate their 4+ GPA if they've cheated their way through school, not earned it?
In the last few days I've been accused of all kinds of crap, including some stuff by the aforementioned GPA stealer. Thank god I have this cold and therefore an excuse to slip away under the sheets with Prince NyQuil, or I'd have been sleepless in the Northeast Heights.
You should move to Connecticut if you love cold weather and LL Bean catalogs. You could go skiing in Vermont and then go hang in NYC and see Broadway shows. You can be a nurse anywhere. And sometimes moving across the country and leaving life and love behind is cleansing and worthwhile.
But remember...wherever you go, there you are.
posted by jill at 21:27
4 Comments:
Sorry to put too much thought into the blog...but sometimes I just need to get those ideas out of my head. And those theories are in practice... at least metaphoricaly. One day is good, the next two bad. the next good, the next bad... and so on untill the events that distinguish the good from the bad fade away, or blend together, into a new, tougher whole.
I like the cold, I used to pour over LL Bean catalogs at x-mas time when i was a kid, and, on the occasions that I've been to NYC, I digged it.
But you're right... Where ever you go, there you are. Am I ok with that? If I don't like what is going on here in NM, is that because of me? The enviorment I find myself in? The associations I have with this place? I think I'm ok with who I am, I'm just not ok with what I'm going through. Still, maybe that is just a desire to diplace the suffering from me to external factors, and that in turn will lead to more suffering... I don't know. Any help?
don't ever apologize for overcallousing your digits. my blogs are just not so thoughtful. although, if i could process my broken but now mending heart on my blog, maybe i'd be further along. who knows.
ending things you know aren't good for you is a hard row to hoe. but at least here in nm, you have people by your side who love you already to help you through the rough patches.
rest assured, if you do move, that i will not be visiting you anytime soon on the eastern seaboard. self-preservation. but there's always email and verizon's in. maybe we can set up a virtual sushi web page or something.
Great. The all-you-can-eat webroll. Water Ho not incuded.
just one more reason to stay.
insomnia sucks, no?
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